Presidential Mediation

As predicted, President Aquino endorsed DILG Secretary Mar Roxas as the Liberal Party's presidential candidate. Senators Poe and Escudero are left out in the cold after those Palace dinners P-Noy hosted to moderate the trio's political ambitions.

Ambition, like greed and other traits that tend to be excessive, are often dealt with in mediation.

Floating Evidence

Sea bullies, beware! Secure your tools of naval destruction, lest they float to your victim's shores. That seems to have actually happened, when "fishermen found these containment booms with Chinese markings in waters off Cabangan, Zambales," as Inquirer reported recently.

Sometimes in mediation, too, if logic or goodwill fails, a little help from nature could lead to some lucky lead to settlement. My aging mother, sued by lot buyers of her subdivision abandoned by the developer, got off the hook due to her dementia.

Projection

It is a defense mechanism people use for psychological self-preservation. Or political, if you will, as Binay does, when he describes rivals as just depending on "name recall, political rhetoric and drama." He could very well be depicting himself!

In mediation and anywhere else, it is best to assume that what people criticize in others is precisely what they do not like about themselves!

Take 5

Months?, i.e. That is what Manila Mayor Joseph Estrada is saying to market vendors of Quinta (5) Market in the meantime it is being rebuilt. Back to sidewalk-vending for them.

Mediation could have sought the needs and interests of the city and its citizens both vendors and consumers, through a win-win compromise.

Aunor's Horror Stories

Local cinema took to the extreme the maxim "Strike while the iron is hot!" Nora Aunor revealed recently that at one point in her popular career, she was shooting five films in different rooms of a mansion at the same time. Of course, it was confusing, and she had to be prompted as to what particular movie she was filming at the moment of what day!

If only we could do simultaneous mediation sessions, perhaps all disputes on bouncing checks one day. Settlement could be chosen from a schedule of payment.
Like mass weddings!!!

Taking (Wood) Stock

Down memory lane yesterday, as "Taking Woodstock" was shown on cable. It presented the back story of the actual country concert about 5 decades (not of the rosary!) ago. I reviewed the movie that covered the actual event for our college paper and remembered the nuns who came over and even made the "peace" sign. Anyway, the couple-farmers who owned the tract of land were able to pay the loan on their property, as well as taste some marijuana-laced brownies!!!

In mediation, it is good to have an idea of the background of the dispute, only in the course of understanding the situation and the best way to solve the conflict.

Guidance & Control

That is not the new name for Guidance & Counseling, and never will be. It has always been based on the volition of the counselee. Guidance & Control refers to the systems lead of the New Horizons project to Pluto, a hi-tech remote control across the galaxy.

Mediation is likewise not subject to control, remote or otherwise. Like counseling, which it is but for two, it relies on the (good)will of both sides.

More Than Meets The Eye Center

Philhealth recently was faced with charges of eye clinics seeing double cataract operations on a patient within a week or two. That is not regularly done.  So with other irregularities, it was further alleged.

Sometimes even eye centers are not clear on their actions. Mediation surely sees more than enough of this trend.

Rat a To We

Regressed to Disney cable network last night, delighted to catch Ratatouille on role reversal in the kitchen. The former pest becomes a chef instead!

In mediation, previous trouble-makers can morph into peacemakers at the prodding of mediators.

Bar Codes

Today's Biz Buzz of the Inquirer had alarming news that our driver's licenses and car plates do not really need barcodes as the owner's name and address, as well as car plate numbers are already shown. It could just be considered as decorative then.

I always wondered why the sitcom Big Bang Theory has an Indian, Raj as token minority nerd. I guess Filipinos would qualify for corrupt token minority. No mediation needed there.

I See Castle

Ice Castle was reshown by Fox cable network. Figure-skating galore to beautiful music. Female lead suffers disability but supported by family and friends, recovers.

Conflicts should also be dealt the same. Faced squarely and cooperatively.

Katam Ko

North Cotabato Rep. Nancy Catamco proved to be true to her name when she criticized indigenous people in what was supposed to be a dialogue with them, legislators and the military. She surely acted like a plane tool of destruction.

It is important that in mediation, disputants come with openness, good will/
attitude/ and feelings about each other, and not just negativity.

Aiding AIDS

Cable AMC (previously thought to stand for American Motors Co) has surprisingly good offerings. Yesterday, they featured, "The Cure," intriguing, so I watched on. It was about a heartwarming relationship of two boys, neighbors who were separated by a fence covered by a thick plastic curtain. The younger boy had AIDS, which did not bother the other boy, supposedly the son of a Led Zeppelin band member who was, of course, always away. The boys go on adventures from floating down their creek on a lifesaver to buy chocolates in the grocery, to picking leaves for curative tea
Threatened with summer camp by AIDS-phobic mother of elder boy, he stows away with young friend to New Orleans in their search for The Cure.

Children could be potential mediators as they see things more clearly and simply, with less bias. They just focus on the problem and try to solve it.

Message in a Battle

Revisited WB's movie, Message in a Bottle last night. The female lead- journalist was aptly portrayed by Robin Wright Penn, who now plays the first lady in tv's House of Cards. Back to the Message, she receives three messages not from the Blessed Virgin, but from a couple who expressed their bottled up emotions and literally "inilista sa tubig." Good for cinematic effect; bad for open communication, even leading to death.
Instead of patching up with the journalist directly, the male lead takes a 4th letter to ask permission from his departed wife, aboard his boat on a stormy day. Fatal idea

While disputants are still alive and maybe kicking each other, perhaps they can "stop and talk for awhile" to each other over mediation.

Anti-Social Media

Despite all the bad effects of social media, there was a good one recently. A most wanted man, not by females but by the law, was caught by his post.

Mediation is keeping up with the times. The usual road to litigation now has an alternative route toward conflict resolution.

Faker/ Stealer

It's now the time for fake rice. They have become homicidal! Before, they just copied designer stuff. One such faker interviewee defended his illegal trade by asking the reporter would he rather he steal? Precisely, he is stealing intellectual property rights

Disputants in mediation sometimes have to be conscientized

Mediation Among Friends and Nations

Reruns of the sitcom Friends are so delightful; nothing beats the original, or next to Three's Company. One episode had the six friends settling the matter of varied income brackets. The three higher-paid treating the other three made the latter feel like charity cases. KKK (paying for one's expenses) was deemed more equitable.

The Greek financial dilemma is like the Friends' crisis on a global scale. Germany and other Euro nations are the more well-off countries dealing with poorer Greece and its IMF debt. Same as in Friends, the starting point is always what the concerned party can afford. Can't squeeze from a stone; now that is not all Greek to me.

50 Cent Bankruptcy

Moral of this poverty mentality- a singer who calls himself 50 Cent filed for bankruptcy. But of course, he is involved in divorce proceedings.

Economic downturns are often the subject of mediation.

Do Nut Lick

One minute Arianna Grande was espousing feminist lines about not being anybody's property. Next she was establishing ownership over all the donuts on a counter by licking them. Such a turn-around.

There are some actions that are plainly wrong. Last heard, this little young lady was admitting her misbehavior, but not in a grand way. No contest to that.

Mediating Heirs

Sunday's Inquirer today featured a helpful article on inheritance. A letter to one's children could be a less expensive and legalistic way of dealing with it. Either way, fairness is the name of the game.

Then, the children would not have through mediation, or worse litigation!

Khumba yeah

Taking a break from watching bad news and analyzing the Kardashians, I chanced upon Fox Family Movies' animated offering, Khumba. He was a half zebra who thus looked literally bottomless.

Cartoons about animals are like modern Aesop's fables that can be team-building fare. This time, issues tackled were social conformity as well as ecological concerns such as sharing of water and safari/poaching.  An ostrich did a Dying Swan ballet!

Sometimes animals can teach us lessons in acceptance, generosity, and cooperation, values needed in mediation.

Making Suman in the Flood

An 83- year old woman from the province ironically called Bata-an, was a refreshing sight on tv. Unlike the complainers, pleaders, and attention- getters, she was makin suman amidst the flood in her kitchen. She must be very liquid!

Lola would be an ideal mediator for her persistence, positive attitude and action.

The Greeks Say No

In a referendum, Greece voted against even more austerity measures to keep up with their financial options as a result of default on their IMF loan obligations.

Solutions to conflict require both sides to agree. In this case, a stalemate ensues, as one side refuses to budge.

TV Anchor Set Free

AFP reported that Brian Williams was taken off NBC's nightly news program for "embellishment of his role in covering in covering the war in Iraq."

Beware of baseless claims and other "creative narration" in mediation, too.

Time and Space Mediation

On a personal note, allow me to relate a bit of family "mediation" we did today. My single son and I decided to celebrate his birthday at Vikings for dinner. Usual routine is, of course, going out together. But he had other plans with friends in the afternoon, so could we instead just meet at the buffet place later? Who says no to a celebrant? lol

If only, other conflicts were as simple as this!

Jeering Jiro

Jiro Manio, a former child star whose talent had been acknowledged, is now a recovering drug and alcohol addict, aside from being a young father. Recently, he acted out the role of the "Terminal Man" in real life at NAIA 3.  Dolly Carvajal's son, IC Mendoza, another former child star, advised him thus: "Okay lang may pinagdaanan, huwag mo lang tambayan."

Mediation believes likewise. Everyone gets into conflict, but don't wallow in it. There is always an amicable way out.

Conditional Forgiveness

Fr. Jerry Orbos had a human interest story in today's Sunday Inquirer. Two sisters reconciled during the illness of the elder sibling.  Punchline came from the latter, "Yes, I forgive you, but that does not count if I get well, OK?"

Mediation is replete with conditions and caveats. Better clear and safe than sorry and caught by surprise.

Hazy Hazing Investigation

Talks between UP and the parents of a victim of campus violence bogged down when the latter walked out. Their demand? That the Student Council chair name the attackers, who happen to belong to his fraternity, too.

That is pure conflict of interest. In mediation, one never handles a dispute wherein s/he is in/directly involved.

Greek Tragedy

Today, we are witness to a large scale drama played on the economic stage. Greece has reneged on its debts to international financial institutions.

On a smaller scale, mediation handles default on payments to credit card companies, financing companies and even usurious creditors!

Frank Pope

According to the AFP news agency, Pope Francis has admitted it is at times "morally necessary" for couples to separate.  Finally, a pope who understands what his flock is undergoing!

In mediation sessions, this is called caucus or one-on-one talk with the individual disputants one after another, after both of them get heated up in discussion. Cooling off is needed in all relationships.

Bwakaw

A local film i also missed, Bwakaw, was featured on GMA News TV's indiekalibre tonight. Timely, as it was about an aging gay man, shown after the U.S. Supreme Court voted to make same-sex marriage legal in all 50 states. The character of Eddie Garcia used the confessional box to transact with the parish priest re his last will, to which the latter remarked, "You are concerned with the things of the past. Don't you want to prepare for where you are going?"

The matter of an executor for one's last will and testament is a crucial matter. At times, heirs want him executed instead! Mediators save these messengers from being shot by having the heirs air their grievance in the hope of keeping everyone of them happy.

Captain Phillips

HBO thankfully featured a movie I missed, "Captain Phillips." Tom Hanks beautifully portrayed the American captain whose cargo ship was hijacked by Somali rebels. He put his life on the line and saved his men. He also tried negotiating with the rebels, first by befriending them. In the end, the awesome naval power of the United States saved Captain Phillips.

Sometimes, we have to try mediating for our own life's sake.

Circle of (Catholic) Friends

The 2nd Avenue movie, "Circle of Friends" was a touching period piece about
Catholic young men and women in school. The lives of six of them were followed from adolescence to young adulthood.  Of course, conflict was bound to arise, this time between two girls over a boy. Two other girls served as buffer and conscience, actually for the guilty girl.

Informal mediation between friends is what the Bible calls "brotherly correction."