Housing Czarina Without a House

During the continuing Senate investigation of Binay, his recommendee at the Pag-Ibig Housing agency, of course cleared him of any wrongdoing in the selection of security guards. OK, granted. But another issue came up. The transfer of the agency's office from a supposedly condemned building, which up to now is supposedly still being occupied. Not only that, relocating to another leased building! And this agency encourages citizens to borrow against their monthly contributions for their own homes! Interesting to know the building's owner of the present office.

Mediators are to be insightful when it comes to reasons offered by disputants.

3D

This current fad in cinema-viewing was given an even newer twist by Nobel Prize -winning economist Paul Krugman at the recent Asian Financial Forum in Hong Kong. Optimistically, he predicted better times once the following are attended:

Deleveraging - global debt is cut;
Demography - negative population growth is reversed in Japan and Europe;
and Dogma    - change in thinking and focus from inflation to helping out countries in
                           crisis like Italy and Spain, as well as China's adjustment of its GDP(50%                            investment and 30% consumption) relative to slow growth.

In meditation, issues of finances, persons and their beliefs are likewise involved. We share Mr. Krugman's belief that there is a way of these conflicts.
               

Mediator Duterte

Presidential doesn't-wannabe Davao City Mayor  Duterte seems to doing something in his favor.  He was able to obtain the release from the New People's Army a jail warden of Compostela Valley. In exchange, he sought the investigation of said warden for illegal drug trade in the provincial jail, as alleged by the NPA.

Some mediator! While other presidential hopeless are sowing dissension, here is a likely candidate trying to attend to the interests of all- life, clean governance and peace. He has my vote on this matter.

Pope vs. Pacquiao

Fr. Tito Caluag defined "the difference between a momentary 'high' and a long-term effect" of Pacquiao and the Pope, respectfully. Crime is avoided during both their fight and arrival. But that's just about it. In fact, Pacman fights, while the Pope tries to mediate them. Pacman is second top absentee in Batasan, while the Pope reports for work even during typhoons. Commitment is their great divide.

This happens when we are "no longer controlled by external factors- what other people will say, image, advancement in unbridled desires and passions... We overcome a sense of victimhood and reconnect with the vision of our authentic self, the inherent goodness and meaning and mission that I believe is in all of us at birth- what Parker Palmer refers to as our "birthright gifts." That is likewise the great equalizer among people that mediation aims to bring out.

Women Pope and Jesuit

Ambeth Ocampo's "Looking Back" upped the ante on the Pope's liberating lifestyle by writing about a Vatican legend about a Pope Joan ca. 9th-11th century who was the original Yentl of cross-dressing females. Later in 1541, a wealthy widow Isabel Roser was a religious groupie of Ignatius Loyola. After papal intercession, Isabel, her lady-in-waiting, and another friend became Jesuitas. However, her nephews sued the Jesuits for their lost inheritance. Isabel ultimately entered a Franciscan convent in Jerusalem till her death.

Mediation has such fascinating storylines, too. Always, though, greed, self-absorption, and questionable motives rear their ugly heads.

Church Buhay vs. State Patay

The Supreme Court has settled the contentious issue of the Bacolod Diocese's tarpaulin featuring Teams Buhay-anti RH bill/ Patay-pro RH bill senatorial candidates on the wall of the cathedral. It upheld the diocese's rights of free speech, expression, as well as to property.  This balanced a previous ruling which declared the government's law promoting responsible parenthood, distributing contraceptives and spreading sex education in state institutions as "not unconstitutional."

Truly Solomonic wisdom! Such is also the aim of mediation, a prudent give-and-take based on reason and justice.

Rabbits Love It

The Pope's comment for parents not to be like rabbits was qualified thus. He actually said, "Some think that- excuse the language- that in order to be good Catholics, we have to be like rabbits. No." That is clear.

Disputes often arise from such quotes taken out of context, received by sensitive or is it guilty? persons or groups. Thank God, Pope Francis was not made persona non grata, the usual Pinoy reaction to such socio-cultural hurts. After all, he is the vicar of Christ!

Yung Lady Luck

Thai's woman leader Yingluck is out of luck. She has been impeached.

That is how the ball bounces. If you enter politics and after your brother, at that, be prepared for the worst if you do not do your best.  No mediation applicable at this point.

Boy Bawang

No, this is not about corniks and other tv/movie snacks. Rather, we focus on the Secretary of Agriculture's name being dragged into the case of smuggling, especially of garlic that caused its prices to soar and be prohibitive.  Only Dracula was glad.

Mediators have to be discriminating about a person's reputation and the rumors to the contrary.  Huwag madala sa maling Alcala ko.  Agree?

Happy Orphan, Unhappy Children

Compare the bright, smiling and positive-thinking Baby in "Dream Dad," with the crying children of the "Two Wives." Take a clue from the titles of these teleseryes. The first is about a single, well-adjusted son of loving parents. The second, about two manipulative and lying women who laid with the same man. These wives make the woman who left Baby at the orphanage look so good! She knew and faced her limitations, even if painful, and tried to compensate for them.

Mediation and later on, annulment cases deal with the children of couples in conflict as unfortunate collateral damage. No wonder the Pope has a soft spot for them!

Magical Thinking

Neal Cruz dealt with this topic last Christmas re the Santa Claus "nice lie" to children. Maybe the only time lying is not a grinch area.

Otherwise, lies are naughty, if not downright evil. No place in mediation, too.

E-salute and Pasa Lord

These are  some of the innovations started by the Pope during his recent visit to the Philippines. By night and even by day, cellular phones Smart, Globe or Sun were raised in his direction as he passed by. Then, at Communion during Holy Mass, people passed the Sacred Host to communicants behind them who couldn't move forward.

Mediation , per se, is likewise a new development in the judicial system. Truly keeping up with the need of the times, too.

Papal In-hospital

That was a distinct possibility last Saturday when, in the drizzle, Tacloban officials in raincoats went about shaking/kissing the hand of the Pope, who was unprotected from the rain. His raincoat came belatedly while he was way up on this Popemobile.
So one wonders about their sincerity when these same officials express concern for the victims of calamity or poverty, when they couldn't even feel such for the Pope. So much also for the vaunted Filipino hospitality!

Mediators have to watch out for these inconsistencies between disputants' claims and their behavior.

Papal Mediator

Letters of concern handed to Pope Francis made him like an "Isumbong Mo kay Tulfo" program or a sort of Carta of Appeals. From aging prisoners to other current issues,  the papal intervention was sought. Truly a Filipino culture of "padrino" for after all, he is the Holy Father!

This reflects our country's lack of empowerment to address the people concerned. Mediation is a small help toward just that, empowerment.

You're A Canadian in CDO

Remember the oldie that went "I'm an Englishman in New York"? Well, there is a real and updated version in Cagayan de Oro. From a British Commonwealth member country, a Canadian citizen is now whooping it up in the hinterlands of Misamis. How did he get there? Well, of course he met some Pinoys working in, where else but abroad, in nearby Hongkong!  He has eaten balut and ridden a carabao, among other things.

Mediation likewise traces such journeys of persons and their disputes, literally if not figuratively.

Chick-en Eggheads

The increased rates on the els (elevated trains for Chicagoans) of the LRT / MRT have produced chicken-and-egg situations. Riders feel improvements in service should be done first before the increase. DOTC and the trains' management say they need the increase precisely to improve service. Another chicken, GMA (not the network but the one with the net worth!) was supposed to increase these rates but held off in order not to increase her downfall momentum.

Similar interlocking situations are all too familiar in mediation. Mediators do the Scouts' task of untying these Grandma's knots in human relationship.

Die Hard

Not about Bruce Willis, this refers to bad habits. In this case, really bad. An escapee from prison was caught red-handed, snatching! Again.

Some people never learn, can't help themselves, and could be what we dread in HR, incorrigible.   This goes for lying, blaming, and other scourges of mediation.

Twists of Failure

With the cable-ready tv decommissioned for a while, we discovered much improved teleseryes on local channels. "Forevermore" is particularly insightful. Despite the usual theme, conversations are light and well, conversational and current, not the kilometric type of yore. A domino effect of situations occurred when an eccentric and plain nasty adult female guest asked for a nanny. Our bida to the rescue. However, she is asked to watch over the sleeping brutey, so is groggy the next day and (byuti nga) spills the breakfast beverage on the guess-who!

Sometimes mediators have to do some forensic work on causes of the effects facing them. So as not to err more.

Intentional Ligaw

That's not wooing. It refers to victims of gunshots during the holidays who were not all by accident. It seems some were premeditated to happen under the cover of the peste-vities.

Mediators have to be wary likewise of the relation between time and motion. Not for work procedures, but regarding alibis and such of disputants.

Lampang Shanghai

New Year's celebrations worldwide were marred by the stampede in Shanghai,
China involving mostly youth scrambling over what were originally thought of
as paper bills thrown from atop a building.  Some points to consider:

1) What a waste of young lives at the start of the year!
2) What was that paper thrower/group thinking? or motive?
3) What an ominous event marking the Year of the Sheep!

Mediation rises above the path of least resistance- self-absorbed acrimony, lawyers, and court suits.  That is its stamp.

Chris Brownie Point

The curious case of American singer Chris Brown's losing his passport and therefore, unable to perform at the Philippine Arena last New Year's Eve got a lot of people either angry, disappointed or understanding. Others were consoled by the fireworks instead.

You will hear similar fantastic alibis in mediation, too. Of course, the other side would be incredulous. It is then the role of the mediator to sift the chaff from the grain of truth.

The Feet

Love the pun of the cartoon B. C. Its Wiley's Dictionary defines "Defeat as Where De Shoes Go."

It is also the likely experience of one party in a lawsuit. Mediation prevents this trudging situation via a win-win compromise between disputants.

Part-ne-er

Perhaps what dooms a partnership is its first syllable. As Kris mentioned this morning, "out of our mouth, into the ear of God!" Wishful thinking or self- fulfilling prophecy?! The second syllable, however, counters the curse with a poetic Never!

Mediation also has two sides. Sometimes, even more, depending on the number of disputants. The mediator then becomes a conductor, making participants play their part in harmony and order.

Magpahenna ka muna

Kids get the darnest thing! We caught this one fun Sunday in Going Bulilit over ABS-CBN.  A mother vacationed in Boracay and told her son to rest after carrying all her luggage. Well, he promptly had himself tattooed!

Lesson 1) Listen well and verify what one hears, if unsure.
              2) Speaker (not only Belmonte, lol) can likewise ask the listener to repeat
                   what s/he just said, to avoid misunderstanding.
              3) Some people just hear what they want to hear!

Keep communication clear, concise, copied in mediation. Of course, agreements are written, signed, and delivered to the clerk of court covering one of the disputants' residence. Just in case, again, one disputant decides to have himself tattooed in prison!

Dapat Purrfect

In the ABS- CBN Christmas episode of "Gift of Life," a familiar phrase caught our attention. "Dapat perfect" was mentioned, bringing back memories of the college psychology lessons of our professor, Sr. Jose Bagtas, ICM, in turn a disciple of Fr. Bulatao, SJ and Papa Freud. Sr. Jose said that most of the unhappiness in the world can be traced to frustrations over our ideas of how things MUST or SHOULD be, often left unsaid to others concerned.

Reality, of course, does not always purr like a contented cat or well-maintained engine. More often, it screeches  and cranks . A lot of mediation would have been unnecessary if ground rules and expectations were set from the start of human relationships.

This Is Where I Live You

Circa 2014, Sarah Palin meets Barbarella, aka Tina Fey and Jane Fonda, respectively. Their movie, "This Is Where I Leave You" reunites siblings and their mother on the death of their father. Like any family, theirs is a tragicomedy.

Families usually gather after the ma/patriarch's death for the will and testament, if there is one, or even two! Hopefully, no mediation is needed, as lawyers have long been more showered with blessings than the heirs.

BOW- Bureau Of Wrongdoing

The Bureau of Correctional needs correcting. We somehow knew of the hankie-pankie inside prison walls, but not to the extent and span of a banda-na. They even had a concert venue there! They have reached mal-long proportions.

Ramon Tulfo had a good suggestion of having an insider military man run the joint. Similar minds to outwit each other? Check mate. Robin Padilla, another reformed insider's insider is a person who could contribute to the snopaking of the BJMP.  And no faking, please. A Raid, like the insecticide, wears off and loses effect after a while.

Mediation is likewise concerned with righting wrongs even before reaching the tumbang-preso.

Kids 1-7

As we celebrate the Epiphany or The Feast of the Three Kings, our thoughts naturally revolve around children. Fr. Tito Caluag quotes a hearsay from a friend's attendance at a lecture: "From age 1 to 7, one must not worry about teaching kids religion, because they are religion."

Is this the rationale behind calling 7 the age of reason? And why the mother is usually granted custody of her child/ren below 7 of age? Someone has also said that we are born whole in spirit, only to be torn apart when exposed to the world. No matter, today's reality for most children 1-7 is far from whole- as far as the family and community are concerned. Mediation is silent witness to this sad and unfortunate situation.

Unnecessary Fiction

I like "Looking Back" with Ambeth Ocampo. He once wrote that the Code of Kalantiaw was a hoax, as declared by the National Historical Institute in 2004. Furthermore, he said hoaxes are usually half-truths that could be fascinating because, like in this case, it "feed(s) on our continuing search for a nation  and
a Filipino identity." It "create(s) what Caroline Hau has aptly termed ' necessary fictions.'"

We don't need fiction in mediation. Truth is strange enough, sometimes. And
facts can imitate fiction, too.

Um-Alice Na

From "Alice in Wonderland," and "Alice does not live here anymore," it is now
"Still Alice." This latest production is about the latest scourge, Alice-zheimers.

We all know about its failing memory coupled with debilitating self-care. In all
these, however, there is a silver lining of being exempted from emotions we still
feel in the "valley of tears." With her dementia, my mother was also providentially taken off the list of respondents filed by lot buyers of her subdivision whose developer was remiss in his obligations. Fate became the natural mediator.

Just Joseph

Before we leave the Christmas season, a note on a really supporting member of the tableau, perhaps a step nearer to the Child than the shepherds. He is Just Joseph. Just is his character as well.  He put the welfare of Mary and Jesus before his own.

In mediation, we have Josephs who are dragged by circumstances to situations not of their making. Bless them for shedding discernment and light on the sessions.