The Feet

Love the pun of the cartoon B. C. Its Wiley's Dictionary defines "Defeat as Where De Shoes Go."

It is also the likely experience of one party in a lawsuit. Mediation prevents this trudging situation via a win-win compromise between disputants.

Part-ne-er

Perhaps what dooms a partnership is its first syllable. As Kris mentioned this morning, "out of our mouth, into the ear of God!" Wishful thinking or self- fulfilling prophecy?! The second syllable, however, counters the curse with a poetic Never!

Mediation also has two sides. Sometimes, even more, depending on the number of disputants. The mediator then becomes a conductor, making participants play their part in harmony and order.

Magpahenna ka muna

Kids get the darnest thing! We caught this one fun Sunday in Going Bulilit over ABS-CBN.  A mother vacationed in Boracay and told her son to rest after carrying all her luggage. Well, he promptly had himself tattooed!

Lesson 1) Listen well and verify what one hears, if unsure.
              2) Speaker (not only Belmonte, lol) can likewise ask the listener to repeat
                   what s/he just said, to avoid misunderstanding.
              3) Some people just hear what they want to hear!

Keep communication clear, concise, copied in mediation. Of course, agreements are written, signed, and delivered to the clerk of court covering one of the disputants' residence. Just in case, again, one disputant decides to have himself tattooed in prison!

Dapat Purrfect

In the ABS- CBN Christmas episode of "Gift of Life," a familiar phrase caught our attention. "Dapat perfect" was mentioned, bringing back memories of the college psychology lessons of our professor, Sr. Jose Bagtas, ICM, in turn a disciple of Fr. Bulatao, SJ and Papa Freud. Sr. Jose said that most of the unhappiness in the world can be traced to frustrations over our ideas of how things MUST or SHOULD be, often left unsaid to others concerned.

Reality, of course, does not always purr like a contented cat or well-maintained engine. More often, it screeches  and cranks . A lot of mediation would have been unnecessary if ground rules and expectations were set from the start of human relationships.

This Is Where I Live You

Circa 2014, Sarah Palin meets Barbarella, aka Tina Fey and Jane Fonda, respectively. Their movie, "This Is Where I Leave You" reunites siblings and their mother on the death of their father. Like any family, theirs is a tragicomedy.

Families usually gather after the ma/patriarch's death for the will and testament, if there is one, or even two! Hopefully, no mediation is needed, as lawyers have long been more showered with blessings than the heirs.

BOW- Bureau Of Wrongdoing

The Bureau of Correctional needs correcting. We somehow knew of the hankie-pankie inside prison walls, but not to the extent and span of a banda-na. They even had a concert venue there! They have reached mal-long proportions.

Ramon Tulfo had a good suggestion of having an insider military man run the joint. Similar minds to outwit each other? Check mate. Robin Padilla, another reformed insider's insider is a person who could contribute to the snopaking of the BJMP.  And no faking, please. A Raid, like the insecticide, wears off and loses effect after a while.

Mediation is likewise concerned with righting wrongs even before reaching the tumbang-preso.

Kids 1-7

As we celebrate the Epiphany or The Feast of the Three Kings, our thoughts naturally revolve around children. Fr. Tito Caluag quotes a hearsay from a friend's attendance at a lecture: "From age 1 to 7, one must not worry about teaching kids religion, because they are religion."

Is this the rationale behind calling 7 the age of reason? And why the mother is usually granted custody of her child/ren below 7 of age? Someone has also said that we are born whole in spirit, only to be torn apart when exposed to the world. No matter, today's reality for most children 1-7 is far from whole- as far as the family and community are concerned. Mediation is silent witness to this sad and unfortunate situation.

Unnecessary Fiction

I like "Looking Back" with Ambeth Ocampo. He once wrote that the Code of Kalantiaw was a hoax, as declared by the National Historical Institute in 2004. Furthermore, he said hoaxes are usually half-truths that could be fascinating because, like in this case, it "feed(s) on our continuing search for a nation  and
a Filipino identity." It "create(s) what Caroline Hau has aptly termed ' necessary fictions.'"

We don't need fiction in mediation. Truth is strange enough, sometimes. And
facts can imitate fiction, too.

Um-Alice Na

From "Alice in Wonderland," and "Alice does not live here anymore," it is now
"Still Alice." This latest production is about the latest scourge, Alice-zheimers.

We all know about its failing memory coupled with debilitating self-care. In all
these, however, there is a silver lining of being exempted from emotions we still
feel in the "valley of tears." With her dementia, my mother was also providentially taken off the list of respondents filed by lot buyers of her subdivision whose developer was remiss in his obligations. Fate became the natural mediator.

Just Joseph

Before we leave the Christmas season, a note on a really supporting member of the tableau, perhaps a step nearer to the Child than the shepherds. He is Just Joseph. Just is his character as well.  He put the welfare of Mary and Jesus before his own.

In mediation, we have Josephs who are dragged by circumstances to situations not of their making. Bless them for shedding discernment and light on the sessions.